The title of this post is misleading. This particular confrontation will be dealing with social situations; I intend on doing another one dealing with being alone in general in the near future. I just woke up and I'm about to go to the dining hall and eat by myself. This sounds really easy, but I've realized that I haven't eaten a meal by myself since I got on campus 2 weeks ago. This is my first time going to school at Skidmore, since I spent my first semester in London with 33 other freshmen. It was a fantastic semester, and I made some friendships that will last a lifetime. Our entire group was somewhat forced to become close, because being in a foreign country and learning how to navigate together was a bonding experience. We are closer than any other large group here on campus, and therefore, we stick out. It's been said that we travel in a pack. We call each other before we go to the D-Hall so that we know we have someone to eat with. Once we get there, inevitably, a couple more of us show up and we are eating at a table for 4 with 10 people. I realize that this must be detrimental in our attempts to make friends outside the London group, because we always seem unapproachable. But it is incredibly comforting knowing that I always have someone to eat with. It seems like very few people here eat by themselves. I wouldn't voluntarily do it because I prefer to talk to people while I'm eating. I also don't want to look like an outcast in a room where pretty much everyone knows each other and I'm still the new person.
When I go in a few minutes, I anticipate seeing at least a few London people. I don't know how I'm going to deal with that, because it's natural for us to end up forming a table together. We'll see what happens. I'm not going to bring anything to do, so that I'm forced to observe what's going on around me. I'll update this post when I get back!
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That was pretty much exactly what I expected. I was a little nervous on my way in and walking around getting food. It was pretty busy and it looked like everyone had a friend to sit with. I found a row of tables for 2 by the window and sat down facing away from the rest of D-Hall. I guess I thought that sitting facing the other way would make me stick out more; all the other people eating by themselves were facing the window too. There were two girls from the London program sitting a few tables away, but I purposely didn't say hello as to continue my experiment (sorry Becca and Lucy!) I found myself eating non-stop, since I had nothing else to do (hiccups ensued). I just wanted to get out of there. I started listening to the conversation of two guys next to me. They were talking about the Beatles. Then something really interesting happened.
There was a guy sitting by himself on their other side. He must have been eavesdropping too because he said, "Excuse me, but are you talking about John Lennon or Paul McCartney?" He just inserted himself into their conversation. It sounded so easy. The three of them continued a discussion of the Beatles, vinyl records, headphone quality, Queen, etc. I was so impressed with the way this person essentially made two new friends while eating by himself. They even exchanged phone numbers at the end of their meals. I wish I had that kind of confidence. Eating alone was scary. I tried to make it as quick as possible and I don't intend on doing it much in the future. But maybe I will. If someday I could get to the point of confidence that that person had, it would be worth it. All of us Londies have been struggling to meet new people because we come across as not wanting to meet new people. Maybe we're prohibiting each other.
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